Where do we go from here? That is a question that is on our minds a lot. Our hearts have been broken for the helpless and the hopeless. We are seeking God continually for His guidance in what He has for us to do. We want to be wholly yielded to Him and His work. To have His eyes and His heart.
We know that we cannot forget the orphans who are still left behind - all over the world and in our own country.
"Not everyone is called to adopt. No one wants parents who adopt children out of the same sense of duty with which they may give to the building fund for the new church gymnasium. But all of us have a stake in the adoption issue, because Jesus does. He is the one who tells us his Father is also "Father of the fatherless". He is the one who insists on calling the "least of these" his "brothers" and who tells us that the first time we hear His voice, He will be asking us if we did the same."
-Russell Moore in Adopted for Life
We do not know what the future holds, but we know that we want to be able to answer Him when we see Him face to face. My heart cannot forget what I read and what I learn about the voiceless in this world. What can you do to help? What can I do to help? How can we be the hands and feet of Jesus to this hurting world? It can seem so overwhelming.
There is a village in Ethiopia named Korah which means "cursed" - just outside the capital city of Addis - and this village is built entirely around and within a massive trash dump. 100,000 people call this trash dump "home". To the rest of the country, the people who live there are cursed. To read a firsthand account about the plight of some of the "least of these" who live there, go to this blog entry.
Please watch these few videos that show the reality of life for 100,000 souls, each one precious to the Lord.
The Village of Korah - A short documentary from Session 7 Media on Vimeo.
Ordinary Hero~ A day in the trash dump in Ethiopia from Kelly Putty on Vimeo.
There is a wonderful organization called Project 61 who is doing something to help the "least of these" in Korah. Through them, we are able to sponsor a child who lives in the dump and provide 3 meals a day, clothing, education, housing, and transportation to and from school for $700 a year. Yes. $700. That's it. To totally change a life. To bring hope where there was none. To feed someone who scrounges around in mountains of trash every single day looking for enough to live on and feed brothers, sisters, parents. The $700 allows this child to go to a Christian boarding school for the year where, most importantly, they will hear the Good News. They will receive an education which will enable them to change their life and the lives of their families. Truly, it is priceless.
When I first heard of this situation, I was struck to the very core. So many emotions. I cried and cried. The next day, I could think of nothing but those dear people who lived in that dump. The next morning, I told my youngest daughter about it. She said, "Mom, let's give up Christmas this year and give that money to sponsor a child there." That night, we asked the other kids about it. They all immediately said, "YES! We don't want Christmas presents. We want to help someone in Korah." It was unanimous.
Now, we don't normally spend $700 on Christmas. But, we believe the rest will come as well. How could it not? And lest you feel sorry for my poor little ones - they still get gifts from grandparents!
We "met" our child today. He is 18 years old and lives in the dump with his sister. Our house was filled with wonder and with joy at the knowledge of the privilege we have to be able to help this precious young man. Because of our American prosperity, he will now have 3 meals a day, education, housing, clothing, and a hope and a future. We won't have Christmas presents that would be forgotten in a few weeks or months. A pretty good trade-off, I think.
We will be corresponding with this young man and sending packages, letters, pictures, etc. We have been told that he will now consider us his family. One day, I truly hope that we will visit him and meet face to face. We hope to be on one of the mission trips to Korah in the future.
Project 61 is still accepting sponsorships until August 31st. There are still children waiting to be sponsored for the September school start-up. Please consider what you can do. I know that most of you already give and maybe already support an orphan somewhere. I'm certainly not telling anyone what to do or putting on the guilt trip. There are thousands of real needs and worthy causes out there. But the situation is so dire in Korah and the money goes directly to helping one hopeless and helpless person - not to postage or mailings or administrative costs. Consider, if a few families go together, then it would not be costly at all to be able to give this kind of a gift. They encourage small groups or extended families to go in together to sponsor. Their website is www.p61.org.
I'm really looking forward to Christmas morning this year. We are going to brainstorm how we want to spend the morning in focusing on the eternal rather than the temporal and giving thanks for the greatest gift we have already been given. I'm excited to see what this does in our kids' hearts and how it impacts us all. So, for now, we serve Korah. We wait to see what God leads us to next... It is a grand adventure!
"Lord, when did we see You hungry, and feed You, or thirsty, and give You something to drink? And when did we see You a stranger, and invite You in, or naked, and clothe You? When did we see you sick, or in prison, and come to You? The KING will answer and say to them, "Truly I say to you, to the extent that you did it to one of these brothers of Mine, even the least of them, you did it to ME."
Matthew 25: 38-40
Wednesday, August 11, 2010
Monday, August 2, 2010
Fam-i-ly
From the first week home, we would recite all of our names and Lukas would repeat after us. "Daddy. Mommy. Riley. Isaac. Eva. Lukas. Yakob..... FAM-I-LY!" in his strong African accent. It was so special to hear him saying that.
We are now nearing the end of our strict cocooning phase. The boys have been with us 11 weeks now. We have been very deliberate about not doing much, staying home a lot, limiting exposure to strange situations or large groups, never leaving them with anyone, etc. It has been hard and isolating...but I think it is having the desired results. I think the boys recognize that we are their family. I am Mom. Tom is Dad. They love their brother and sisters. They are showing signs of feeling safe with us and learning to trust us more and more. Of course, there is much farther to go, but I think that we are on the right track. There is definite progress.
So...part of this is seeing more of our extended family. The boys got to meet more family last Friday. Tom's family from Chicago came into town and we had a great time together. So, that means they have met all of their immediate aunts, uncles, and cousins - except my brother who is serving our country in Afghanistan. With each new experience of meeting family, the boys have shown more and more relaxation and seem to really recognize the difference between family and others. They love their grandparents!
In light of this, we decided to take our first road trip. My older three kids have been in Ohio all week at our annual family reunion gathering at my grandmother's house. It has been very hard to not be there with them since we decided that it was too soon to take the boys. But, we cracked and just had to take them for a few hours this past Saturday. It turned out to be a wonderful experience! The boys handled the 4 hour drive there beautifully. And they slept the whole way home, too! It was really special to introduce them to my grandmother's home where I have made so many lasting memories of my childhood. The boys loved the lake and ran for it as soon as they saw it. They didn't want to get out of the water! I'm so glad that my grandma could come out and see them enjoying the lake that she and my grandpa created so many years ago just for the purpose of watching their family enjoy it. The boys were heartily welcomed by great aunts, uncles, and cousins. It was a good day - and a fitting end to the beginning of coming out of our cocoon.
Road trip - oh yeah! And who can start a road trip without a stop at WalMart for the necessary supplies - Gobstoppers and Junior Mints - oh, and Pull-Ups.
We are now nearing the end of our strict cocooning phase. The boys have been with us 11 weeks now. We have been very deliberate about not doing much, staying home a lot, limiting exposure to strange situations or large groups, never leaving them with anyone, etc. It has been hard and isolating...but I think it is having the desired results. I think the boys recognize that we are their family. I am Mom. Tom is Dad. They love their brother and sisters. They are showing signs of feeling safe with us and learning to trust us more and more. Of course, there is much farther to go, but I think that we are on the right track. There is definite progress.
So...part of this is seeing more of our extended family. The boys got to meet more family last Friday. Tom's family from Chicago came into town and we had a great time together. So, that means they have met all of their immediate aunts, uncles, and cousins - except my brother who is serving our country in Afghanistan. With each new experience of meeting family, the boys have shown more and more relaxation and seem to really recognize the difference between family and others. They love their grandparents!
In light of this, we decided to take our first road trip. My older three kids have been in Ohio all week at our annual family reunion gathering at my grandmother's house. It has been very hard to not be there with them since we decided that it was too soon to take the boys. But, we cracked and just had to take them for a few hours this past Saturday. It turned out to be a wonderful experience! The boys handled the 4 hour drive there beautifully. And they slept the whole way home, too! It was really special to introduce them to my grandmother's home where I have made so many lasting memories of my childhood. The boys loved the lake and ran for it as soon as they saw it. They didn't want to get out of the water! I'm so glad that my grandma could come out and see them enjoying the lake that she and my grandpa created so many years ago just for the purpose of watching their family enjoy it. The boys were heartily welcomed by great aunts, uncles, and cousins. It was a good day - and a fitting end to the beginning of coming out of our cocoon.
Road trip - oh yeah! And who can start a road trip without a stop at WalMart for the necessary supplies - Gobstoppers and Junior Mints - oh, and Pull-Ups.
It's been in the 90's for days, but this day was cold and rainy. It didn't stop anyone, though! Eva couldn't wait to get playing with Yakob and Lukas in the water.
Riley was so happy to be reunited with Yakob after not seeing him for a week.
Made to be brothers for sure!
Yakob kept wanting to jump off the dock. We have to watch that little dude at all times.
My older three get home in an hour or so and I can't wait for all FIVE of my kids to be home together again!
Monday, July 19, 2010
Nine Weeks
Nine weeks ago yesterday, we met these little guys for the first time.
Nine weeks. I never knew that so much could happen in nine weeks' time.
Joy and heartache. Grieving and rejoicing. High highs and low lows. Sickness and health. Hospital stays and powerful healing. Parasites and expelling of parasites. Accepting and denying. Rebelling and surrendering. Changing and staying the same. Going forward and going back. Doubt and faith. Questions and answers. Holding on and letting go. And lots of growing.
None of us are the same people we were nine weeks ago. Not even close.
God has broken me and is in the process of rebuilding me. Who I thought I was, I am not. What I thought I knew, I did not know. God alone is my sufficiency. I have so very far to go, but "one thing I do, forgetting what is behind, and pressing forward to what lies ahead." I am learning more to trust, yield, and obey.
"Trusting simply means that when we have yielded, or given, ourselves to the Lord, then we have perfect confidence that He will manage us and everything concerning us exactly right, and we consequently leave the whole care and managing in His hands."
In family news, Lukas got his first haircut which was great fun apparently:
And he learned to copy his name with his sister, Riley's, help:
And after our dentist visit, we found out that Yakob is actually closer to an 18 month old rather than a 2 year old. No surprise, there, really, since we suspected that all along. So, I still have a one year old! :-) A one year old who really enjoys big shoes...
Thursday, July 8, 2010
The Great Physician
Wonderful news to report! God, the Great Physician, has healed our son. Yakob's bloodwork was redone last week and has come back perfectly normal. This little boy with a hugely swollen spleen and severe anemia is being healed! There is no anemia whatsoever anymore! His spleen is recovering slowly, but surely. What joy! What a privilege to be his mama and to see the Lord at work healing him. What a blessing to see immediate restoration of health in our sweet son who would have been without hope a very short time ago. To God be all the glory! Only God could bring him to us in such perfect timing in order to save his life. To be a part of this story is beyond compare!
Yakob also saw the ENT today. We found out that he does have mild hearing loss (as we suspected) in both ears most likely due to recurrent ear infections that have left holes in both eardrums. The right ear is missing 20% of the eardrum. The doctor told us that he doesn't do surgery to repair this sort of problem until age 6 due to the nature of the surgery which requires skin grafts. He did say that there is a "minimal chance" of the tissue regenerating on its own. In the meantime, we are not to allow any water in his ears for.....4 more years! Since there is no seal in his eardrum, water can lead to continual infections. Gulp. So, please join us in praying that God, Jehovah Rapha, heals and restores his eardrums and his hearing. We will have check-ups every 6 months to keep an eye on him.
And, can I just say, that the difference in today's doctor appointment from our first one the week we got home is truly astounding. Today, I had a completely calm, quiet, happy little boy on my lap during testing and prodding. He felt safe and secure and trusted me to take care of him. He was not in pain. He was healthy. It is amazing to me the changes that can occur in 7-1/2 weeks. God is weaving our lives together into the family that He intended us to be before time began.
Oh, and did I mention that Yakob has great taste in sports teams?
Yakob also saw the ENT today. We found out that he does have mild hearing loss (as we suspected) in both ears most likely due to recurrent ear infections that have left holes in both eardrums. The right ear is missing 20% of the eardrum. The doctor told us that he doesn't do surgery to repair this sort of problem until age 6 due to the nature of the surgery which requires skin grafts. He did say that there is a "minimal chance" of the tissue regenerating on its own. In the meantime, we are not to allow any water in his ears for.....4 more years! Since there is no seal in his eardrum, water can lead to continual infections. Gulp. So, please join us in praying that God, Jehovah Rapha, heals and restores his eardrums and his hearing. We will have check-ups every 6 months to keep an eye on him.
And, can I just say, that the difference in today's doctor appointment from our first one the week we got home is truly astounding. Today, I had a completely calm, quiet, happy little boy on my lap during testing and prodding. He felt safe and secure and trusted me to take care of him. He was not in pain. He was healthy. It is amazing to me the changes that can occur in 7-1/2 weeks. God is weaving our lives together into the family that He intended us to be before time began.
Oh, and did I mention that Yakob has great taste in sports teams?
Go Boilers!!
Go Colts!
Thursday, July 1, 2010
Adjusting - Part I
I'm not gonna lie. The past 6-1/2 weeks have been some of the hardest of my life. Adjusting is hard to do. I've never been good at it - and guess what - I'm still not. :-)
We had been told that preschoolers and toddlers were the hardest age groups to adopt and that adopting two at one time was very difficult. I would agree with that. :-) We've done twins before, so we've added two at a time to our family before, but this is a whole different thing... :-)
The boys are incredibly wonderful little boys. My 10 year old son said it best when he told the social worker at our first post-adoption visit that "they fit perfectly into our family!" And they really do. Their personalities fit right in. They are funny and goofy and giggly and silly.
So, it's not the boys that have made this hard. I believe we were blessed with the sweetest boys in all of Ethiopia to join our family. It's the adjustment. There are multiple, multiple facets of adjustment that we are dealing with - none of them bad, just necessary and often difficult.
I have struggled with my sinful nature more than I can ever remember. I battle daily with my selfishness. I have failed often. I'm not proud of it. But it's true. I have been discouraged and overwhelmed, frustrated and exhausted.
But...
God.
God is present. God is at work. God has called us to this. I wake up every morning and I pray "God's grace is sufficient. His power is made perfect in my weakness." And it's true.
Tonight, when I was putting my sweet boys to bed, I became overwhelmed at the incredible privilege God had given me. These boys trust me. They cling to me while I rock them to sleep. They grab tight with their little hands and hang on to my neck or my arms. They allow their bodies to melt into mine and they sigh loudly as they let their defenses down to prepare for sleep. They feel safe with me. Their walls are steadily, but surely coming down.
While I hold them and rock them, I pray that their birthmother knows in her heart of hearts that her boys are being rocked to sleep. That they are loved. That they are safe. That they are laughing. That they are playing. That they are eating tons! That they are healed of the disease that took the life of their father. Oh, the ways of God are so beyond our understanding. What a privilege. What an honor.
I do not think that I could know God in this way without going through the difficulty inherent in adoption. There is no question that God has shown me more in the past weeks than ever before in my life. My life will not be the same.
So, no, this has not been easy. We didn't adopt because it was going to be easy. In fact, I don't recall Christ ever saying that following Him was going to be easy. I remember Him saying things like "die to yourself", "take up your cross", "share in my sufferings". We adopted out of obedience to our Lord. We adopted because, for us, there was no other option. We adopted because our Father adopted us - and I guarantee that was not easy.
A woman I highly admire who adopted 4 older siblings from Ethiopia wrote about this topic at Our Unveiled Faces . Her words spoke exactly what I have been pondering over the past weeks. I hope you will take a few minutes to read it.
So, tonight, as I was rocking the boys to sleep, I felt strongly that God was telling me to write this down and to say to anyone reading this who might be considering adoption and is worried that it would just be too hard - well, it probably will be. :-) Do not let fear of difficulty stop you. But, seek the Lord and His ways. "Whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for My sake will find it." I want to find my life. My life is only found in obedience to Christ.
I read this tonight and it really spoke to me. I only have one life. It will be over soon. Oh, how I want to spend it on eternal things.
“Two little lines I heard one day,Traveling along life’s busy way;
Bringing conviction to my heart, And from my mind would not depart;
Only one life, ’twill soon be past, Only what’s done for Christ will last.
Only one life, yes only one, Soon will its fleeting hours be done;
Then, in ‘that day’ my Lord to meet, And stand before His Judgment seat;
Only one life,’twill soon be past, Only what’s done for Christ will last.
Only one life, the still small voice, Gently pleads for a better choice
Bidding me selfish aims to leave, And to God’s holy will to cleave;
Only one life, ’twill soon be past, Only what’s done for Christ will last.
Only one life, a few brief years, Each with its burdens, hopes, and fears;
Each with its clays I must fulfill, living for self or in His will;
Only one life, ’twill soon be past, Only what’s done for Christ will last.
When this bright world would tempt me sore, When Satan would a victory score;
When self would seek to have its way, Then help me Lord with joy to say;
Only one life, ’twill soon be past, Only what’s done for Christ will last.
Give me Father, a purpose deep, In joy or sorrow Thy word to keep;
Faithful and true what e’er the strife, Pleasing Thee in my daily life;
Only one life, ’twill soon be past, Only what’s done for Christ will last.
Oh let my love with fervor burn, And from the world now let me turn;
Living for Thee, and Thee alone, Bringing Thee pleasure on Thy throne;
Only one life, “twill soon be past, Only what’s done for Christ will last.
Only one life, yes only one, Now let me say,”Thy will be done”;
And when at last I’ll hear the call, I know I’ll say “twas worth it all”;
Only one life,’twill soon be past, Only what’s done for Christ will last. ”
C.T. Studd
And, how could I leave you without a picture of my sweeties...taken at YJ's 2nd birthday!
Please do not stop praying for us. We really do rely on your prayers.
Isaiah 26:3
"The steadfast of mind You will keep in perfect peace, because he trusts in You.
Trust in the Lord forever,
For in God, the Lord, we have an everlasting Rock."
We had been told that preschoolers and toddlers were the hardest age groups to adopt and that adopting two at one time was very difficult. I would agree with that. :-) We've done twins before, so we've added two at a time to our family before, but this is a whole different thing... :-)
The boys are incredibly wonderful little boys. My 10 year old son said it best when he told the social worker at our first post-adoption visit that "they fit perfectly into our family!" And they really do. Their personalities fit right in. They are funny and goofy and giggly and silly.
So, it's not the boys that have made this hard. I believe we were blessed with the sweetest boys in all of Ethiopia to join our family. It's the adjustment. There are multiple, multiple facets of adjustment that we are dealing with - none of them bad, just necessary and often difficult.
I have struggled with my sinful nature more than I can ever remember. I battle daily with my selfishness. I have failed often. I'm not proud of it. But it's true. I have been discouraged and overwhelmed, frustrated and exhausted.
But...
God.
God is present. God is at work. God has called us to this. I wake up every morning and I pray "God's grace is sufficient. His power is made perfect in my weakness." And it's true.
Tonight, when I was putting my sweet boys to bed, I became overwhelmed at the incredible privilege God had given me. These boys trust me. They cling to me while I rock them to sleep. They grab tight with their little hands and hang on to my neck or my arms. They allow their bodies to melt into mine and they sigh loudly as they let their defenses down to prepare for sleep. They feel safe with me. Their walls are steadily, but surely coming down.
While I hold them and rock them, I pray that their birthmother knows in her heart of hearts that her boys are being rocked to sleep. That they are loved. That they are safe. That they are laughing. That they are playing. That they are eating tons! That they are healed of the disease that took the life of their father. Oh, the ways of God are so beyond our understanding. What a privilege. What an honor.
I do not think that I could know God in this way without going through the difficulty inherent in adoption. There is no question that God has shown me more in the past weeks than ever before in my life. My life will not be the same.
So, no, this has not been easy. We didn't adopt because it was going to be easy. In fact, I don't recall Christ ever saying that following Him was going to be easy. I remember Him saying things like "die to yourself", "take up your cross", "share in my sufferings". We adopted out of obedience to our Lord. We adopted because, for us, there was no other option. We adopted because our Father adopted us - and I guarantee that was not easy.
A woman I highly admire who adopted 4 older siblings from Ethiopia wrote about this topic at Our Unveiled Faces . Her words spoke exactly what I have been pondering over the past weeks. I hope you will take a few minutes to read it.
So, tonight, as I was rocking the boys to sleep, I felt strongly that God was telling me to write this down and to say to anyone reading this who might be considering adoption and is worried that it would just be too hard - well, it probably will be. :-) Do not let fear of difficulty stop you. But, seek the Lord and His ways. "Whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for My sake will find it." I want to find my life. My life is only found in obedience to Christ.
I read this tonight and it really spoke to me. I only have one life. It will be over soon. Oh, how I want to spend it on eternal things.
“Two little lines I heard one day,Traveling along life’s busy way;
Bringing conviction to my heart, And from my mind would not depart;
Only one life, ’twill soon be past, Only what’s done for Christ will last.
Only one life, yes only one, Soon will its fleeting hours be done;
Then, in ‘that day’ my Lord to meet, And stand before His Judgment seat;
Only one life,’twill soon be past, Only what’s done for Christ will last.
Only one life, the still small voice, Gently pleads for a better choice
Bidding me selfish aims to leave, And to God’s holy will to cleave;
Only one life, ’twill soon be past, Only what’s done for Christ will last.
Only one life, a few brief years, Each with its burdens, hopes, and fears;
Each with its clays I must fulfill, living for self or in His will;
Only one life, ’twill soon be past, Only what’s done for Christ will last.
When this bright world would tempt me sore, When Satan would a victory score;
When self would seek to have its way, Then help me Lord with joy to say;
Only one life, ’twill soon be past, Only what’s done for Christ will last.
Give me Father, a purpose deep, In joy or sorrow Thy word to keep;
Faithful and true what e’er the strife, Pleasing Thee in my daily life;
Only one life, ’twill soon be past, Only what’s done for Christ will last.
Oh let my love with fervor burn, And from the world now let me turn;
Living for Thee, and Thee alone, Bringing Thee pleasure on Thy throne;
Only one life, “twill soon be past, Only what’s done for Christ will last.
Only one life, yes only one, Now let me say,”Thy will be done”;
And when at last I’ll hear the call, I know I’ll say “twas worth it all”;
Only one life,’twill soon be past, Only what’s done for Christ will last. ”
C.T. Studd
And, how could I leave you without a picture of my sweeties...taken at YJ's 2nd birthday!
Please do not stop praying for us. We really do rely on your prayers.
Isaiah 26:3
"The steadfast of mind You will keep in perfect peace, because he trusts in You.
Trust in the Lord forever,
For in God, the Lord, we have an everlasting Rock."
Saturday, June 26, 2010
What a difference a year makes!
A year ago, we were not even thinking about adoption. Well, at least I wasn't actively thinking about it at the time. I know Tom wasn't thinking about it. We had just figured out the source of our daughter's health problems and we were working on getting her healthy again. That had consumed us for quite a while. We were trying to make adjustments and get on with living. Riley had won an art contest and we were heading out for our FREE dude ranch vacation in Wyoming!!
This Father's Day, we have five children rather than three! More arrows in our quiver, more gifts from the Lord.
The day we drove off for the ranch last year was June 27th. This June 27th, we celebrate our youngest son's 2nd birthday! What a difference a year makes!
Happy 2nd Birthday, YJ!! We love you so much. We are so glad that you are a part of our family and we get to celebrate your life together!!
Thursday, June 17, 2010
Travel Journal
This post has been in the works for a long time now. I haven't had the time or the energy to do it. But, so many of you prayed us through it. I wanted to give you a glimpse into that week and the many ways that God answered your prayers during it. Get ready -this is long!
Our trip to Ethiopia to pick up our boys is really beyond description. In many ways. It was surreal. It was miraculous. It was unbelievable. It was exciting. It was what we expected. It was not what we expected. It was harder than we ever imagined. It was the beginning of the rest of our lives with our two precious sons.
Tom and I left on a Friday afternoon. We were so excited to finally be on our way. I was so glad the bags were finally packed!! We dropped off the kids at my moms and driving away from her house, I finally let the tears fall that I had been holding back all week. We flew to Minneapolis, to Amsterdam, stopped in Sudan for refueling, and then on to Addis Ababa. I really enjoyed the very long trip. I knew it was time for Tom and I together that would be hard to come by for awhile. We watched movies, slept off and on, ate, and met some other adoptive couples. I kept imagining what it would be like to make the same trip home with two little boys - and it scared me to death!
We arrived in Addis late Saturday night, totally exhausted. In the very long customs line, we met a nice man fronm South Africa who currently lives on the West coast. As we talked, he told us that he was going to be preaching the following morning and had worked for a long time finding sponsors for children with Compassion International. The man in front of us in line was with John Piper's ministry. We felt surrounded already by God's people and it was so encouraging. After getting through that long line, we finally met up with two other families in our travel group and got in the van with them to head to the hotel. It was so neat to finally meet some other families. One of them was adopting siblings as well and one was adopting a four year old girl. Our travel group was very unique in that four out of the five of us were adopting siblings (and Yakob was the youngest of the group). There were no babies in our travel group which my CM told me was a first. What a blessing to have other families in our group with similar situations and ages so that we could relate to each other. We were actually in Addis and only a few hours away from meeting our sons! We were extremely exhausted and ready for some good sleep!
The hotel was very nice. We were supposed to have a suite with two bedrooms and a living room, but we ended up with a single room since the suites were all being used. It ended up being the perfect room for us.
SUNDAY
On Sunday afternoon, we met Almaz in the hotel ballroom to finish the paperwork that was necessary before meeting our sons! Did I mention surreal?? Almaz was just as amazing as everyone says she is. What a servant and what incredible work she does to bring these orphans into homes!
After this rather lengthy meeting, we crowded into the van and headed off for Hannah's Hope. I think I felt rather numb actually. I knew I was excited, but it just felt like it wasn't really happening. Almaz had warned us that she didn't think Yakob would come to us and that he would cry a lot. She thought Lukas might do okay.
Our meeting of the boys was not the fairy tale story. It was a realistic one, though. And really, we knew it would be. God had been preparing me all along. I knew the meeting was going to be difficult. Our boys are pretty sensitive little guys. Lukas was old enough to know what was going on. I don't blame him one bit for his reaction to us. It makes perfect sense. He just didn't want to be with us. Period. He understood that the life that he just become comfortable with was about to be taken away and he was going to be forced to leave with total strangers! Yes, he definitely understood. To say it was hard would be quite an understatement. And, even though it was hard for us, I cannot begin to imagine how hard it was for our sweet little 4 year old boy who just trying to survive in this world. I don't want to go into details for his privacy's sake.
We don't have pictures or video of our meeting the boys because we were taking pictures for another family and they just brought the boys out to us when we weren't prepared. We didn't even have our cameras nearby. I'm sad about that, but I think it may be for the best really.
Yakob did go to me intially, but wasn't real happy with me. I put him in the sling carrier and kept him with me for the rest of our visit. The lollipop bribed him enough to stay with me. Definitely no eye contact, though! We got a short tour of Hannah's Hope, but it was all pretty stressful as we were trying to focus on the boys. The other families left without us because Lukas was having too hard a time to get in the van. The van returned for us and we did make it back to the hotel, but it was just a pretty heartbreaking situation for all of us. We knew that God had orchestrated this and we were trusting Him to work it all out and get us all through it.
It was a difficult first evening together. Lukas was really, really grieving. However, at some point, God just intervened. Lukas allowed me to give him a bath and we saw his first smile! I can't tell you the joy and relief we felt to see a glimpse of that!!
On Monday, we got up bright and early to make our 9:00 a.m. U.S. embassy appointment. The drive with all 21 of us in a small van in out of this world crazy traffic was something else! We were quite nervous about how Lukas would do given his initial reaction to us. However, again, God just stepped in. (The prayers of His people.) We did all successfully make it through that very long morning of waiting in a small room packed with people. Lukas just kept his back against the wall and stayed very quiet and still, but he made it! He didn't want us to touch him at all. YJ allowed me to keep him in the sling the whole time and was rather happy! An Ethiopian man there asked me about the boys and our situation and then thanked us for giving the boys this opportunity. He really encouraged me with his words. I know that God knew I needed that right then!
After arriving back at the hotel, we all took a 4 hour nap. Now that I know Lukas so much better, I can tell the stress he was under to be willing to take a 4 hour nap. All of us really, really needed that nap!
Tom and I didn't sleep much at all during the trip. The jet lag, the stress, the emotions, just kept us awake most of the time. We didn't eat a whole lot either. In fact, we both lost 6 lbs. each in one week!
On Wednesday night, we decided that we either had to venture out for the cultural dinner or lose our minds. We opted for the dinner! Wes, our driver, was so good with the boys. He explained to Lukas what was happening and Lukas was able to get back in the van without too much fear. We all really enjoyed the restaurant experience. The dancing was unbelievable! We took lots of video footage. Or I should say Lukas took it. The video camera became his security blanket and he held it in front of his face a lot. We could not believe that we were actually in Ethiopia and really tried to soak it up since it was really our only opportunity to experience the culture firsthand. The boys devoured the food! Yakob was the last one eating, including all the adults, and we finally had to just remove the food. That night really helped us a lot. It was such a relief to get out of the hotel. And we had some hope for Lukas making it through the trip home. We had both been having lots of trouble sleeping and were quite concerned about how we were going to get these boys home!
I felt really sad driving away from the restaurant. I knew this was the last time they would eat a real Ethiopian meal like that in their own country, listening to the music, seeing the dancing, and being surrounded by things that were familiar. At least for quite a while. We really do hope and pray to take them back someday.
Our trip to Ethiopia to pick up our boys is really beyond description. In many ways. It was surreal. It was miraculous. It was unbelievable. It was exciting. It was what we expected. It was not what we expected. It was harder than we ever imagined. It was the beginning of the rest of our lives with our two precious sons.
FRIDAY
Tom and I left on a Friday afternoon. We were so excited to finally be on our way. I was so glad the bags were finally packed!! We dropped off the kids at my moms and driving away from her house, I finally let the tears fall that I had been holding back all week. We flew to Minneapolis, to Amsterdam, stopped in Sudan for refueling, and then on to Addis Ababa. I really enjoyed the very long trip. I knew it was time for Tom and I together that would be hard to come by for awhile. We watched movies, slept off and on, ate, and met some other adoptive couples. I kept imagining what it would be like to make the same trip home with two little boys - and it scared me to death!
SATURDAY
We arrived in Addis late Saturday night, totally exhausted. In the very long customs line, we met a nice man fronm South Africa who currently lives on the West coast. As we talked, he told us that he was going to be preaching the following morning and had worked for a long time finding sponsors for children with Compassion International. The man in front of us in line was with John Piper's ministry. We felt surrounded already by God's people and it was so encouraging. After getting through that long line, we finally met up with two other families in our travel group and got in the van with them to head to the hotel. It was so neat to finally meet some other families. One of them was adopting siblings as well and one was adopting a four year old girl. Our travel group was very unique in that four out of the five of us were adopting siblings (and Yakob was the youngest of the group). There were no babies in our travel group which my CM told me was a first. What a blessing to have other families in our group with similar situations and ages so that we could relate to each other. We were actually in Addis and only a few hours away from meeting our sons! We were extremely exhausted and ready for some good sleep!
The hotel was very nice. We were supposed to have a suite with two bedrooms and a living room, but we ended up with a single room since the suites were all being used. It ended up being the perfect room for us.
SUNDAY
We got up about 9:00 a.m. after the only good sleep we were going to get on this trip. This was the day! We were too late to eat at the buffet, so we had protein bars in our room.
On Sunday afternoon, we met Almaz in the hotel ballroom to finish the paperwork that was necessary before meeting our sons! Did I mention surreal?? Almaz was just as amazing as everyone says she is. What a servant and what incredible work she does to bring these orphans into homes!
After this rather lengthy meeting, we crowded into the van and headed off for Hannah's Hope. I think I felt rather numb actually. I knew I was excited, but it just felt like it wasn't really happening. Almaz had warned us that she didn't think Yakob would come to us and that he would cry a lot. She thought Lukas might do okay.
Our meeting of the boys was not the fairy tale story. It was a realistic one, though. And really, we knew it would be. God had been preparing me all along. I knew the meeting was going to be difficult. Our boys are pretty sensitive little guys. Lukas was old enough to know what was going on. I don't blame him one bit for his reaction to us. It makes perfect sense. He just didn't want to be with us. Period. He understood that the life that he just become comfortable with was about to be taken away and he was going to be forced to leave with total strangers! Yes, he definitely understood. To say it was hard would be quite an understatement. And, even though it was hard for us, I cannot begin to imagine how hard it was for our sweet little 4 year old boy who just trying to survive in this world. I don't want to go into details for his privacy's sake.
We don't have pictures or video of our meeting the boys because we were taking pictures for another family and they just brought the boys out to us when we weren't prepared. We didn't even have our cameras nearby. I'm sad about that, but I think it may be for the best really.
Yakob did go to me intially, but wasn't real happy with me. I put him in the sling carrier and kept him with me for the rest of our visit. The lollipop bribed him enough to stay with me. Definitely no eye contact, though! We got a short tour of Hannah's Hope, but it was all pretty stressful as we were trying to focus on the boys. The other families left without us because Lukas was having too hard a time to get in the van. The van returned for us and we did make it back to the hotel, but it was just a pretty heartbreaking situation for all of us. We knew that God had orchestrated this and we were trusting Him to work it all out and get us all through it.
It was a difficult first evening together. Lukas was really, really grieving. However, at some point, God just intervened. Lukas allowed me to give him a bath and we saw his first smile! I can't tell you the joy and relief we felt to see a glimpse of that!!
MONDAY
On Monday, we got up bright and early to make our 9:00 a.m. U.S. embassy appointment. The drive with all 21 of us in a small van in out of this world crazy traffic was something else! We were quite nervous about how Lukas would do given his initial reaction to us. However, again, God just stepped in. (The prayers of His people.) We did all successfully make it through that very long morning of waiting in a small room packed with people. Lukas just kept his back against the wall and stayed very quiet and still, but he made it! He didn't want us to touch him at all. YJ allowed me to keep him in the sling the whole time and was rather happy! An Ethiopian man there asked me about the boys and our situation and then thanked us for giving the boys this opportunity. He really encouraged me with his words. I know that God knew I needed that right then!
After arriving back at the hotel, we all took a 4 hour nap. Now that I know Lukas so much better, I can tell the stress he was under to be willing to take a 4 hour nap. All of us really, really needed that nap!
Tom and I didn't sleep much at all during the trip. The jet lag, the stress, the emotions, just kept us awake most of the time. We didn't eat a whole lot either. In fact, we both lost 6 lbs. each in one week!
TUESDAY
Tuesday was rather hard. There was a lot of crying going on. Lukas was afraid to leave the room at all. And we had no words to communicate anything of safety or comfort to him. We tried to go down to the breakfast buffet, but it was a disaster. So, we spent the day in the room. A really long day. The rest of the families headed out for the shopping trip. They leave their kids at HH and go out to buy souvenirs. Almaz had told us that we were basically on "hotel arrest" with Lukas and we knew there was no way we could take Lukas back to HH at all.
I gave a short list to one of the other moms, and she picked out some nice things for us. Thank you, Donna!
Another family (the curly headed brothers) bought a pizza for us when they were out and brought it up to the room for us. They hung out for awhile and I think it was comforting for Lukas to see his friends. It was a huge blessing for us just to have some company and not feel so isolated. The pizza did not taste like ours, but I ate it because I was desperate for some comfort food. The boys gobbled it down. Thanks, Nelson family!!
We were able to skype with home and that was a wonderful blessing. What joy to see the kids at home! Lukas really enjoyed seeing them, too.
WEDNESDAY
I was awakened at 5:30 on Wednesday morning after having just gone to sleep by very loud pounding on doors and very loud voices. I felt panic immediately. I had seen people being frisked the night before coming into the hotel and we knew the election was just days away. I envisioned us grabbing the boys and having to flee the hotel. Fatigue and stress compounded to make me very nervous! Finally, the pounding reached our door. Tom jumped up to get it. It was a man and woman with suitcases saying they were looking for someone. That's all we knew. Well, no more sleep after that! I was sure there was a bomb or something in one of those suitcases... :-)
Both boys really struggled on Wednesday. Yakob cried inconsolably for hours as did Lukas. At one point, both boys were wailing at the top of their lungs and we just sat and looked at each other. They would not receive our comfort. On the positive side, each day we all took 2-3 hour naps and that helped so much.
We also ordered room service for the boys several times since we had a hard time making it down to the dining room. They loved the food and it seemed to help comfort them.
Wednesday afternoon, Tom went with the rest of the group back to HH for the last meeting with Almaz. I so much wanted to go, but we felt it was best that I stay with the boys. I was very disappointed not to see more of HH. I wanted to have more to memories to give the boys as well as just soak up their environment, meet some of the other children there, even say a word or two to the boys' special mothers. It just wasn't to be for us on this trip. God knew that and I trusted Him with it.
On Wednesday night, we decided that we either had to venture out for the cultural dinner or lose our minds. We opted for the dinner! Wes, our driver, was so good with the boys. He explained to Lukas what was happening and Lukas was able to get back in the van without too much fear. We all really enjoyed the restaurant experience. The dancing was unbelievable! We took lots of video footage. Or I should say Lukas took it. The video camera became his security blanket and he held it in front of his face a lot. We could not believe that we were actually in Ethiopia and really tried to soak it up since it was really our only opportunity to experience the culture firsthand. The boys devoured the food! Yakob was the last one eating, including all the adults, and we finally had to just remove the food. That night really helped us a lot. It was such a relief to get out of the hotel. And we had some hope for Lukas making it through the trip home. We had both been having lots of trouble sleeping and were quite concerned about how we were going to get these boys home!
I felt really sad driving away from the restaurant. I knew this was the last time they would eat a real Ethiopian meal like that in their own country, listening to the music, seeing the dancing, and being surrounded by things that were familiar. At least for quite a while. We really do hope and pray to take them back someday.
THURSDAY AND FRIDAY
We were so happy to wake up Thursday and know that we would be on the way home that night. It was another long and emotional day. We did get out to the back parking lot and hang out for a bit with another family and their sweet little 4 year old daughter. That helped. We spent the rest of the day packing and preparing. I felt sick to my stomach all day - my nerves were churning like crazy. I just could not imagine how we were going to get them no an airplane and make that 24 hour trip home.
We left the hotel around 7:00 p.m. for our 10:50 p.m. flight. Lukas had a hard time getting in the van. It was emotional for all the kids. Several of them were quite a bit older and truly did realize that they were leaving everything familiar behind. One of the older girls cried and cried as she watched Yakob drive away on my lap. It was very eye-opening and difficult to watch.
As we drove up to the airport, there were mobs of people everywhere. And the lights in the whole airport went out just as we pulled up!
The boys did amazingly well through the very long lines and the long wait for the flight. It was such a blessing to have three other families on the same flight to Amsterdam with us. There is safety in numbers!
We knew so many were praying us home and I can't tell you how much that comforted me! They slept almost the whole flight to Amsterdam (middle of the night their time). Amsterdam to Detroit was a little more interesting. But, we were mainly concerned with Lukas and his fears - and he did so well!! He did not cry once. He allowed Tom to take care of him and really enjoyed the screen in the seat in front of him. The power of prayer once again!! Yakob was another story. Now I realize how severe his double ear infection was as well as other medical issues - it's amazing he did as well as he did. About five hours into that flight - I thought I was done - I just couldn't finish it. Funny how you have no choice at 36,000 feet. :-) We did make it and it could have been much worse. The flight from Detroit to home was short and sweet. The boys slept the whole way.
Our homecoming was wonderful!! It was the best feeling in the world to arrive home to our loved ones' faces. I had kept telling the boys over and over during the week - "We're going to make it, we're going to make it." And we did! By God's grace and the loving prayers of so many.
As hard as that week was for us, we know that God was with us every second. I continually thanked Him while we were there for the many answered prayers that we were experiencing. As hard and uncomfortable as it was for Tom and me, it was infinitely more so for our boys. They amaze us with their courage, strength, and resiliency. It really is beyond my comprehension how they have survived so much and come out with this joy and love of life in them. What a testimony to the way that God has designed the human spirit.
We have come so far since these pictures and this story. So very far. And it's only been 4-1/2 weeks. Just think of what the future holds! I will post some more of our story in the days to come. God is at work without a doubt. He is alive. And He is moving in our lives.
TO GOD BE THE GLORY! GREAT THINGS HE HAS DONE!!!
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